


regret and guilt. (the burden of it all)

by clingytwtinc



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Hurt No Comfort, Minecraft Roleplay - Freeform, Other, Panic, Regret, and glitchy lol, classifies enough to be one i suppose, glitchy isnt a villain dont make him one ‼️, i dont rlly have tws for this story, idk i speak from experience but its not fully a panic attack, maybe?? - Freeform, no beta we die like bee, theres death and panic attack kinda sorta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:48:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28830690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clingytwtinc/pseuds/clingytwtinc
Summary: cricket gets overwhelmed. he does what his mind forces him to do.
Kudos: 3





	regret and guilt. (the burden of it all)

**Author's Note:**

> this is an oc fic with me and a few other friends in an smp. love u guys  
> the only romantic relationship is bee and cricket love u kit mwah smoochie  
> cricket is a cat boy by the way he just doesnt show it x

The three sat in their discussion room, a heavy, tense silence hung between them. Glitchy was by the entrance to the tunnels, propped against the wall stubbornly. Cricket and Bee were sat dacing each other, sour feelings bouncing between them. The energy was unmistakble in the room; Frustration.

"Are you missing this book, Bee?" Cricket held up a diary of sorts, watching them visibly tense up and flick their gaze around momentarily. "I am," they mutter unsteadily, as though approching a wild dog.  
Silence made his ears ring.  
"Can i have it back?"  
*Can you have it back.* Cricket bit back a sharp retort, jaw tense and set with hesitation. Glitchy answered for him, and made relief dizzying.  
"This is what we wanted to talk to you about." He commented simply, leaning off the wall and into a standing posture.  
Cricket didn't miss the tremor that Bee had- but he never commented on it. He started talking.   
"Is my home in danger?" He tried. It came out shaky, and he winced. He didn't like seeming so powerless.  
Bee shuffled awkwardly, glancing around. "I... No," They started. "It's just, with Mr. E, you know...? I'm paranoid."  
Inwardly, Cricket huffed; he had no idea what the drama with Mr. E was and he wasnt ready to ask. Instead, he set to ignore them; asking about the numbers which were periodically spread about. Bee brushed them off with a shaky wave of hand, and it took Cricket all of his willpower to not comfort them. He pushed his hands together in an attempt to rid this feeling. (It never went away.)  
"This isn't you." He stated suddenly, making them jump in alarm.  
"I'm fine! everything's fine!" The response was unsure, and they looked away.  
"Bee." The response was immediate.  
Glitchy cut in again, and they spoke for a few minutes, Cricket's ears rung and he tuned out the conversation, an attempt to ground himself served futile. He was only brought back by voices being raised, and he flinched.  
"Bee. This isn't you."  
Bee fell silent, the attention remained on Cricket for a long time. It made his skin itch uncomfortably.  
"What do you mean?" It was a shaky reply, it was soft, and *hurt*. And God, he wanted to shame himself for it. He bit his tongue, forming words in his mind.  
"When I started Grasslands with you, you weren't... Like this. You've been off. I'm not blind."  
He was firm- very unlike he was a few moments ago.  
Bee went on to say they were a little different; lingering on the fact they hadn't changed and it was just their father's death that thwarted their mood. The problem? Their father was in this very room and if anyone could tell off energies, it was *him.*  
"This isn't you, Bee. You can repeat it like a broken record all you want to- but it wont change my mind. This is not you, and I refuse to believe it will *ever be* you."   
Bee froze, locking eye contact for a long moment. Silence passed over them, and he was sure a pin being dropped would echo through their cave system.  
"I know I may seem... different," Bee began reluctantly. "But.. In the end? Everything comes to a close. I know it does."  
Cricket's heart rate picked up. "What does that mean?"  
Bee shrugged. Cricket stood abruptly, frustration making him seethe. "Tell me."   
Bee winced, looking away.  
"I know someone who will approve of my destructive acts." They muttered simply, and gave a glare to Cricket. "Because I know my family wont."  
Cricket felt panic rise, for the first time in a while. He hadn't realized he was trembling. How long was he trembling for?  
He glanced down, staring at his hand which was tightly closed around a Lodestone compass; he held it as though it was his lifeline. He felt the sting behind his eyes, and straightened from his previous position of leaning over the table, watching the tension release from Bee's shoulder's for a moment.  
"What are you planning?" He asked the question, and *fuck,* his voice was shaky again.   
Bee huffed. "Nothing," was the simple retort. Cricket tensed.  
"Tell me."  
Bee went silent.  
Cricket took a step back from the table, turning to meet Glitchy's eye. He had an unrecognizable expression, for reasons unknown to Cricket. *Help me! What am I supposed to do?*  
"If Cricket doesn't do anything, I will."  
It was only now that he realized Glitchy had a tight grip on his sword, and his heart plummeted. *Is this un-optional?* Panic rose in his chest, making his throat close breifly. "Dont," he pleaded, reaching forward shakily. It came out weak and thick.   
Glitchy hesitated, then handed him his sword. 

It happened so fast, one moment he was stood right in front of Bee, shouting and *begging* them for an answer. The next, he was crouched over them, who lay dying on the cold cave floor. He was holding them tight, hyper-aware of their grip on his shirt loosening by the moment. He was taking in sharp, heavy breaths, and all he could process in his mind were a million and one apologies and infinitely more guilt and regret biting at him like cold night air. He wanted to redo. He didn't know what came over him- What forced him to do this.   
Even now, as he stands in front if his small nation, reading the Grassland's Ruleset, he still doesn't know why. Now, only gold glances and feelings of regret pass between the two.


End file.
